NEVER BLEND IN is an accessible book about achieving personal authenticity, a groundbreaking and vital book of exclusive celebrity and deeply personal non-celebrity interviews, which is aimed primarily at a young lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or questioning audience. The book, however, is also of value to educators, parents, family and mental health professionals seeking insight into the LGBTQ experience.
Role models from education, entertainment, law enforcement, medical and emergency services, politics, religion and sports have participated in this accessible and much needed discourse to illuminate the reader’s journey of self-discovery and to illustrate that living a life unlimited by labels will lead to personal, professional and spiritual fulfilment.
These candid stories and wise words are a powerful toolkit to encourage, inspire, uplift and give hope to those who need it most; those who may feel disenfranchised or who may lack self-belief.
These stories of living authentically, with dignity and unlimited by labels will help readers to understand how self esteem determines the path they choose and that life need not be a self fulfilling prophecy when they improve self-concept, drive out fear and embrace new challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, eliminate self imposed limitations and cease dependence on others to provide validity.
David E. Watters
Stuart Milk, nephew of Harvey Milk and Equality Advocate, has said: “I love your work, which is vital to show the richness of embracing and celebrating our wonderful diversity. As Harvey would say, you’re bringing medicine into the world that the world needs! Thank you!”
Since graduating from The Institute of Education, University of London, David has gone on to train with LEAP, as a mediator, and is a qualified facilitator forThe Pacific Institute.He is a writer on social inequality issues, is a key player in the Equal Love Campaign UK and author of the forthcoming book, NEVER BLEND IN which features key voices from the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender community and which aims to inspire and encourage those who may lack self-esteem or who question their validity.
David is currently promoting a youtube campaign “Give ‘em Hope” and is asking individuals, couples and groups to make and share videos telling about the benefits of living with personal authenticity.
He has shared a platform with Stuart Milk and Peter Tatchell and is a supporter of 17-24-30, The Trevor Project, Schools Out and The Harvey Milk Foundation.
I think that out of everyone in society LGBT people, especially LGBT youth, are subjected to most negative energy and the most negative portrayals of themselves and so it’s really important for us as a community to give back and to let people see that the sun can shine
Stuart Milk, nephew of Harvey Milk and Equality Advocate, has said: “I love your work, which is vital to show the richness of embracing and celebrating our wonderful diversity. As Harvey would say, you’re bringing medicine into the world that the world needs! Thank you!”
I have worked with a myriad of Harvey Milk related researchers in recent years and I wish they were all as thorough and considerate as Mr. Watters. I trust him and his workmanship implicitly.
He (Harvey Milk) had great confidence in me; I really felt that the basic message was “you can do it”. He was a cheerleader first and then he would deconstruct content second. I think there was always this attention to helping somebody really feel that they can make their way.
If you look at his speeches that’s there; there’s really this broad stroke that’s about positivity and confidence so you’re on the right path in terms of carrying on his work that way.
For me as a care professional, working in chem-dependency, to have any kind of guidebook that talks about self-esteem or how to keep people from committing suicide…I’m all for it. The few kids that have shown up that had suicide ideation, quite honestly, I didn’t have a template for what to tell them so I had to rely upon my intuition but I have no idea if I’m doing the right thing. I definitely feel that the therapeutic community, the psychological therapeutic community has a role to play in LGBT civil rights and I applaud you for doing this.
I was reading some of your pages on your website and I thought, “This is the antidote to my suicidal friend. If he could just read this, it would help him rephrase what he is defaulting to now.”
For young people coming to terms with their sexuality it’s really important that they have positive, high achieving role models as a way of boosting their self esteem and confidence. This kind of book shares the experience of a very diverse group of LGBT people. Individual and collective experience offers the inspiration and motivation for LGBT people to do something worthwhile with their lives and live their dream.
There are two ways you can approach not fitting in. If you get to see it as a blessing, feeling like an Outsider can eventually give you the freedom and license to create your own world, follow your own goals, and make your own reality. I’ve always thought it must be a lot harder for those who effortlessly belong – how much stronger the temptation to just blend in and be a non-questioning sheep! Yes, there is pain. Feelings of rejection, confusion, self-doubt. But think of those negatives in a positive light: you have the chance to acquire resilience, fortitude, understanding and the realization but you have one life to live, so you absolutely have the right to live it your way!
It’s no shame to get help and inspiration from others, which is why David Watters ‘Never Blend In’, is so timely.
TRISHA GODDARD
…some people growing up LGBT will certainly want affirmation that they are not alone, but they will also (quite rightly IMHO) resist the idea that there is a “type” and that they fall into a categorisation. Such is the human paradox, yearning to assimilated and demanding to be treated as unique and apart. A part of the tribe and apart from the tribe. There are plenty of young LGBT people I know or have known who hate the idea of any sort of ghetto or connection with others. I’m Jewish and I’ll fight against anti-Semitism, but I’ll also raise issues about Israel’s violations of human rights and express my happy atheism and contempt for much of Judaism… It’s not a question of “hurrah, there’s a role model, now I know who I am and who my people are and where I belong in the world.”
Role models are described as those individuals who we ‘aspire to’ and who provide strong and achievable targets that we can emulate in pursuit of our career or personal aims. This book breaks down the common stereotypes of gay people and unveils a more realistic perspective, chronicling the success of many gay role models that others aspire to.
Be inspired by the successful members of the gay community; real men and women. Read about the challenges they faced along the way, what helped to keep them going, and what it takes to make a small business, a life, a success.
This book illustrates the breadth and creativity of gays everywhere. It is a pioneering work and the success stories of inspirational gay role models from a wide variety of backgrounds should be made available in every library, every school. These are men and women you can aspire to but who have all shown just what it takes to become a role model – determination, courage and an unwavering desire to succeed.
“Never Blend In” brings you some amazing candidates all of whom have succeeded in very different ways. They each have inspiring stories to tell about their achievements and future ambitions, yet I noticed they all had one thing in common they were passionate about what they did.
So in reality gays are still struggling for acceptance and to reach the top of the ladder. However, I think for the gay who enters the celebrity arena or who decides to do his/her own thing - they no longer have to do it at the expense of their happiness- they can do things on their own terms. For many it will provide them with the work/ life balance that wasn’t available for them in the past. It’s vital we have gays in big business and we need more gays to be there. I think companies need to realize they can’t operate without gays.
But they do need to provide the very thing we all tend to take for granted – the basic right of being given the same opportunities and earning power as str8 men. We are mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, lovers, and friends. We are like you.
Anthony Spiteri, BS, MSc, PhD (Psychology)
I am excited to order several copies of your book and share them with friends and family as gifts. I may try to use it with one of my classes that I teach at my college on the psychology of diversity.
DR JOHN R. SHAFER,Director of the Counseling Center and Professor at Franklin College of Indiana, President, Shafer Consulting Services
Gladeana McMahon, As one of the leading personal development and transformational coaches in the UK, Gladeana was instrumental in founding theAssociation for Coaching for which she now holds the positions of Life Fellow and Vice President.
“David is a rare individual. Someone with a cause but also someone who is pragmatic. He understands his area but also the way the world thinks and is not judgemental but someone who looks for a ‘win/win’. This is rare but is the measure of the man. I would heartily recommend him for his intelligence, people ability and pragmatism.
The Book that David Watters is proposing is long overdue as there is little written on the topic of LGBT issues.
Positive role models are important to individuals whether they be LGBT individuals talking about their experiences or the family and friends of such individuals who can model acceptance and positive affirmation. Therapists are likely to be interested in such a book in a bid to understand the specific needs of those who identify as LGBT considering the best ways to work with such individuals and/or their families. Academics are likely to find the book useful in considering issues around diversity and, of course, the general public will also benefit as a book of this sort educates the reader. This book will also help LGBT individuals to understand their situation and consider how to develop a deep and meaningful sense of self-worth. It will also help such individuals understand how best to help those around them to understand their situation as much as it will educate family and friends.
The LGBT community has often been portrayed in a less than favorable light – NEVER BLEND IN rips that inaccurate veil off, and offers a face and portrait of today’s LGBT community, its leaders, history, accomplishments and potential.
We can never become complacent in our fight for equal rights and we need to remember the trailblazers who ignited the spark for the flame of progress that burns today.
As role models following in the legacy of others like Harvey Milk, we need to stand as proud confident people and continue to broaden the path of acceptance for those that follow us.
This project authored and edited by David Watters will help certainly reach out and touch a generation of young people who will be the ones to carry on his legacy by helping transform our perceptions of the LGBT community and lay the foundation for a healthy and whole sense of self.
David Watters is a highly motivated author and freelance writer. He is passionate in his work, inspiring others to become their best selves, and to value themselves and others. His considerable writing skills help create and promote inclusivity and equality for all people, and offers another positive role model for youth and others on the margins.
Rev. David Weekley (Minister at United Methodist Church )
…we are in the fight for our very lives. NEVER BLEND IN says that we are committed to living out in the open, as we have a right to do. NEVER BLEND IN, means never settle for second best or the notion that we are “second class citizens” I will NEVER blend in.
I always feel inspired by someone everyday. I think we should learn something new each day from anywhere or anyone. I’m inspired right now, by you, answering your intelligent questions Mr. David Watters. It’s not often I get to answer some great meaningful questions. So Bravo!!!
There’s plenty of times in this world where we can feel isolated and alone and anytime we can find a source of community, a feeling of being a part of something bigger than ourselves; that can provide tremendous inspiration and solace, then that’s invaluable.
“David Watters is a tireless advocate of social justice and engaging writing. Working with David on a community service project in San Francisco, with him in England, was a breeze, fun and highly effective. I recommend his services, charm and, most importantly, passion for any advocacy needing to be done.” Melton Cartes, Chief Ad Guy, AnAdGuy.com
“I had the opportunity to work with David as part of his team in the performing arts department. During that time David had a great leadership styles that enable his staff to develop at their own pace, while maintaining a high standard for his team. His advice and support for CPD has been extremely beneficial which has resulting in me writing development programs. Furthermore, David’s passion on the subject of equality and diversity was very inspirational. With this in mind, I recommend David as a leader who can write about our unique experience’s in and outside the working environment. Hope to work with him in the near future.” Michael Noble, Owner, IyPSchool
“I can highly recommend David for his ethics, his talent, and his dedication to nurturing individuality and originality through his fine writing. David uses the gift of the written word to inspire leadership by preserving the memory of historical visionaries who dared to be different. His essays on Harvey Milk and his determination to “never blend” preserve an important man and time in history while encouraging all of us to realize that we all have the power to change history ourselves on a grass-roots level with community outreach and activism.” Joe Mannetti, Contract Clinician, Waterford Youth Services Bureau
“DAVID WATTERS is not a relative, although I’d be proud to be in his family. David is a fine writer and passionate advocate, a man who boldly uses his intellect, wit and sense of fairness to every project he undertakes. If you are looking for the spark to ignite your plan, call DAVID WATTERS.” Willie Watters, attorney/author
“…all that David does involves assisting people – any and all people – to live authentically, to no longer accept the judgments and limitations imposed on them by others, and to believe in themselves as valid individuals. To that end, he has recently undertaken two new endeavors: NBI Associates, an organization which empowers people to make personal and professional transformations, and the “Give ‘em Hope” video campaign on YouTube.” Extract from a profile of David Watters on 10,000 Couples by Rev. Heidi Mann. FULL PROFILE:http://10thousandcouples.com/issue/april-2011/article/someone-you-should-know-david-e-watters
A PRO-EQUALITY BLOG, written by Diversity Specialist, writer and motivational speaker David E Watters (NBI ASSOCIATES).
Articles on Equality & Diversity, Personal & Professional Development, Education & Management; his book, NEVER BLEND IN (http://www.nbiassociates.co.uk/Never-Blend-In.html), and the Give 'em Hope Campaign http://www.nbiassociates.co.uk/Give--em-Hope-Campaign.html)
